The spider plant monologue

The spider plant on the windowsill of our office’s reception area is dying. Already, one of its offspring had to be quietly taken out of the room and disposed of. The second child is doing better, but it’s now up to me to bring in some soil and a pot for it to grow into. I’ve watered the whole family, but sometimes too much, and other times maybe not quite enough. Some people feel a connection to plants. I’ve worked in the Garden Centre at Home Depot and watched the way some women plunge their fingers down fearlessly into the roots and finger the leaves so deftly. I don’t know the rules of plants. I’m always too careful or not careful enough, and I can never seem to remember the signs of over watering until it’s too late. I am determined, though, not to let this spider plant and its mini die. I will keep bringing them back from whatever mistakes I make.

I need to do this because of what’s outside the window. From here on the 29th floor, I can see the mountains. And they are beautiful, and scary, and full of possibility. Those Garden Centre women can keep muddying around in the dirt, while I go off to explore and challenge those mountains on skis, bike, or on foot. That is where my connection is, not to plants, but to earth on the grand scale – creating stories while delving into epic dreamscapes.

But first there is the spider plant. “Fake it till you make it”. I’m sure you’ve heard that gem before. It works. I’m going to fake my connection with this plant until I begin to learn its rules, to understand a few concepts in its language. And I’ll keep watching those mountains, because it’s going to take a whole lot of fake it till I make it to have the freedom to be with them. I’ll have to step with courage into situations I’ve never dealt with, present what I do with confidence, and look out of the box to form a career around my dreams. There are so many languages to learn before you can speak your own.